Being in the Flow

Abraham started the discussion by explaining that our thinking affects our vibration, and that our vibration is our point of attraction.

"You are the Creator / Attractor of your experience. The balance of thought within you equals your vibration which equals your point of attraction."

"Lack is the disconnect between you and your Inner You. A negative emotion is an indicator that your thought is in a place of lack and you are mis-creating."

"The path of least resistance is the path of most allowing."

"When you feel bad or are having a bad experience, the only thing that matters is that you change your vibration. You might be mad at something. Work your thoughts to how you can feel good. This changes your vibration. By changing your vibration, you are changing your future."

"The way you are vibrating is how you attract future events."

"First, learn what you do not want. Then change your vibration, or you will create what you don't want."

(On this tape, Abraham used the terms Inner You and Inner Being interchangeably.)

Abraham explained an imaginary pipe between you and your Inner Being. When the energy is flowing through the pipe you feel an impulse and follow it and are in the flow. Synchronicity happens. When you are not feeling the full connection through the pipe, life is harder because you are not able to feel the impulses and be in the flow.

Abraham told us to: "Decide that your vibration is of the utmost importance, and everything else is far down the list. Find first the harmony between you and You, and then you will be guided literally to the interactions which will lead you to harmony."

She used the metaphor of a nail near a magnet. The magnet is your Inner Being and the nail is you. You can push the nail closer to the magnet and yet nothing happens. You keep nudging it closer, and all of a sudden the nail is close enough and is pulled to the magnet.

"With each positive thought, you raise your vibration and get closer to your Inner Being. When you are connected with your Inner Being, you see the farthest and make the best decisions."

Abraham said many of our problems come from the energy in which we make decisions. "Most decisions are made to soothe the inner emptiness. This is not a good idea."

"When you connect with your Inner You, then you are the You that you've wanted to be."

"If you are not in a place of feeling good, you cannot get the guidance from your Inner Being."

"Be in that place of feeling connection and strength and then make decisions."

Freedom

A father told Abraham that he wants to disown his son because of his lack of respect among other things.

Abraham said “If this were not important to you, you would have no emotional response to it. If someone you don’t know calls you and says they will never talk to you again, you don’t care.”

“Your emotional response is the harmony or lack of it with your Inner Being. While you are having this statement (wanting to disown the son), your Inner Being is not vibrating anywhere near you.”

“Anything you do from a place of negative emotion is counterproductive.”

“Your connection with your Inner Being is the most important thing -- more important than your relationship with others.”

Abraham then talked about the generation gap and how different generations have a difference in their general approach to life.

“It doesn’t matter what generation you were born in. Most of you were guided away from your Inner Being. You find fault with anyone who does not conform to your beliefs. Your overall viewpoint is ‘My way is better than yours.’’”

Referring to the man and his son, she said “Both generations are disconnected from your source of knowing as you have these confronted feelings. You vibrate apart from who you really are.”

“This relationship is not as important as your relationship with your Inner Being.”

This was her suggestion: “Bless this rotten son with a bad attitude for the part that is he playing in your extraordinary wanting. You are willing to let go of this troubleshot so you can feel good.”

She said the father’s intention should be: “I am wanting to have negativity released from my physical experience so I can vibrate in harmony with who I am. Nothing is more important than that I feel good.”

“When you discover your ability to feel good in spite of what someone outside of you is doing or feeling, then you have found total freedom.”

“The belief that someone else must not exist in order for you to feel good violates your greatest knowing -- which is that you create your own experience.”

“It is much easier to find positive thoughts if you don’t have something negative in your space. The idea that you do not have control over how you feel, that you are disconnected from your true being -- then you are in the mode of justifying.”

Abraham suggested we remember that “’Nothing is more important than that I feel good. The way I view life is through my perceptions. I am affected by it, as is everyone who is affected by my vibration. Therefore it is important I feel better, because I am an uplifter. In a connected state I am wiser and surer.’”

“When you are in a pure place of vibration, you can choose not to be with negative people. When you are in a place of pure vibration, the negativity does not haunt you and cause negative attraction -- then it is beneficial to everyone that is a part of your vibration.”

“When you give your attention to anything, you atrract it. As you give attention you send your vibration to an energy web -- reaching out and attracting an object of attention. When you say yes to something, you attract it. When you say no to something, you attract it.”

“Think what you do want. Be around positive people, interact with people who are deliberate in what they speak and think. Then negative people will not be as much a part of your experience.”

“Have you had an experience where you acted unlike yourself? Others’ negative expectation of you was so powerful they extracted behavior from you that is not really you.”

“We want to point out the part of this relationship with negative others that is yours. You can feel it, not like it, acknowledge it, then focus on what you prefer. Then the parts of him that bring you most negativity will be less a part of your experience.”

“Don’t make a decision about what you don’t want - ‘I don’t want to see him anymore’ -- instead focus on what you do want ‘I want to associate with positive people’.”

“Take your own responsibility for what you feel and discover your freedom -- because as long as someone else can change what you feel, you are not free.”

Inner Guidance, part 2

"Your Inner Being exists in a place of positive emotion."

"When you say 'the only thing that matters is that I feel good,' you are really saying 'I want to harmonize with who I really am.'"

Abraham suggested we start a Book of Positive Aspects -- "write things that make you feel good."

She reminded us that we have to feel good in order to attract what we want. "So many ask their prayers from a place of lack and deepest sorrow and despair -- and from that place they want to attract someone to assist them. You have to feel happy in order to attract what makes you happy."

"If you get up every morning saying 'I want to feel good,' you will attract things that help you feel good."

"Identify what you are wanting and allow that thought essence to come forth."

"All the things you want and hope to know, your Inner Being is aware of. It is prepared to give you moment-by-moment guidance on choices that will suit you best right here in the now."

"Spend some time identifying what you want to know, and then ask it, and listen and expect some sort of communication."

"You attract unto you the balance of your thought. If you are negative, you will attract something consistent with your negativity."

"When you want to do something you know others disagree with, you tend to justify yourself. When you get in the mode of justifying, you are in the mode of negative attraction."

"Your Inner Being is wanting you to be at the point of listening to the guidance that comes from within. We are wanting you to trust your own impulse."

"You are the creator of your experience. You are the attractor of your information."

"This inner part of you exists in a place of powerful and passionate emotion. You have access to the energy of the universe. You contour it by thinking."

"Energy is the bridge between what you've identified that you want and you. This is how inspiration comes. Identify what you want to know and it will come. Unless you doubt or say 'I'm not good enough', etc. -- then you send the energy in the opposite direction."

"Be more specific of what you want, and more expectant that it will come."

"Sometimes you are not in the place where you can hear the answer. When you are in a receptive place it will come, through a dream, through friends, through the crack of least resistance."

"Identify what you are wanting, and keep your eyes and ears open."

"'I can have anything.' That is how you enhance your trust."

"When you have a positive emotion, you are allowing what you want. When you have a negative emotion, you are allowing what you don't want."

"We focus on what we want. We ignore what we don't want. And we live happily ever after."

"Everything you see upon the earth is being maintained by the attention of the non-physical."

"Acknowledge the value of your physicalness."

"You can see the non-physical when you're focused on the non-physical. Your Inner Being can see the non-physical and translate it as you need to the physical."

"Your intent of growth, freedom and joy are intertwined."

"Focus on growth, receive joy , which leads to freedom and more growth. Keep moving forward. Be attuned to your inner guidance. Pay attention to how you feel."

Inner Guidance

On this tape, Abraham suggests we listen to our own inner guidance rather than the guidance of others.

"The majority of guidance you get from other humans is 'watch out' and 'be careful.' Inner Guidance is much more positive."

"Your Inner Being is in a place of pure, positive energy. It feels wonderful."

"The better you feel, the greater you are in harmony with your Greater Intent. The worse you feel, the farther away you are from your Greater Intent."

Abraham uses the term Inner Being to describe the part of us attuned to our Greater Intent. We access it by feeling good, then turning our attention within and seeing how we feel when we consider certain thoughts or actions. When we feel bad, our Inner Being is steering us away from them.

"Your Inner Being does not use scare tactics to guide you. If you understand you are here to live and decide and learn - and learn to use your inner guidance system - then you are in a place of positive attraction."

"Gravitate towards what feels good rather than run from what feels bad."

"You do not get what you want by fighting against what you do not want."

"If you are making clear positive statements of what you do want, your inner guidance system will guide you to them."

"When you make statements of what you do not want from a place of lack, you are vibrating at such a rate that your Inner Being cannot communicate with you."

"If a thought vibrates at a place you are not at, it has a negative effect on the body of a tourniquet around the neck. When you think thoughts of lack, you put a tourniquet between you and you, and you cannot recognize your guidance."

"Think thoughts in harmony with who you are. Thoughts of lack vibrate lower and slower than thoughts of abundance."

"When you think lack about yourself, those thoughts do not vibrate in harmony with you."

"Look for reasons to feel good, and thoughts that uplift you."

"It is the role of you and your Inner Being to decide what is appropriate for you."

"Start by saying 'I want to feel good. I want to resonate with all that does good in the Universe.'"

"When you are in thoughts of criticism, negativity or lack, you are in a place where you cannot hear your Inner Guidance."

"Inspiration occurs when you focus on something you are wanting. By Law of Attraction you have full connection with who you really are."

"Inspiration does not come to someone focused on lack of inspiration."

"When you think thoughts that are not in harmony with your greater wanting, you feel bad. And that is the disconnect between you and your Inner Being."

"Think thoughts that are in harmony with who you really are."

Happy Ending

You cannot have a happy ending to a journey that has not been happy along the way.

-- Abraham

Career, part one

On this tape, Abraham reminds us of our ability to create our own experience. She also warns us about the perils of manifesting from lack.

“You are multi-faceted beings, and your dominant intent of being here is to gather life experience.”

“Decide that your dominant intent / chosen career is to live happily ever after. Gravitate toward those activities that are in harmony with your inner being - freedom, joy, happiness. Don’t choose one tiny box and try to get your whole experience from it.”

“When you allow someone to dictate how you should behave, you are in a place of negative attraction, and you will get defensive and feel the need to justify yourself.”

She said most people do not feel fulfilled in their beingness. “They are looking outside of themselves for acknowledgement from others to feel success . This is out of harmony with the laws of the universe. When you take action from the perspective of lack, it adds more to the lack.”

Abraham explained that the main thing that gets in our way of being great creators is our belief that we are unworthy. “Your challenge with your career is your belief that you must justify your existence.”

She suggests we release that superficial belief and go deeper. “You have a a core belief that knows that coming into physical experience is learning more than you knew before. Every being has an understanding that they are here in physical body to learn / experience more.”

“As physical creatures, so much of what you do is to soothe something that feels wrong. You act to avoid negative consequences. These actions will not lead to something that will be fulfilling. Most allow themselves (because of pressures of society) to be hammered into a pigeonhole. So they come into a place of lack and cannot feel freedom, joy and growth. They are always trying to soothe something that is wrong, to find the piece that is missing.”

“You cannot have a happy ending to a journey that has not been happy along the way.”

She said we are all here for freedom (the basis of life experience), joy (the object of life experience) and growth (the only possible result from living in freedom with the object of joy).

Our troubles come because we have been convinced we are not worthy. “From that place of lack you try to prove you are worthy. You have nothing to prove to anyone. Your existence is justification enough” for you to exist.

“Be in your freedom. Have as your goal to feel joy, and growth will naturally be the process.”

“Your career is a creation - the subject of your creation is your joyful life experience.”

“You are here to gather around you enough stuff, being and doing that you feel good. Then you ooze that good feeling to all that is. If you keep trying to prove yourself worthy, you offer pain and suffering and lack to the world.”

“There is much doing, and much you can offer, but from a place of lack you will never add it.”

“What you radiate out is consistent with what you attract. If you ooze lack, you will attract it.”

“As you are thinking, you are vibrating. As you vibrate, you are attracting.”

“You think your action is responsible for your getting. We tell you that your acting is responsible for a miniscule amount of what you receive.”

“You focus on illness, then you get ill, then you take action to get rid of illness. We say, you are going about it the hard way.”

“The process of attracting what you are wanting starts from inside. Say ‘I want to feel good, feel my value and my purpose. I want to feel my freedom, growth and joy.’”

“Concentrate on looking for those sorts of feelings for a while, then your life plan will begin to unfold in a good way.”

“Your work here is to seek joy. You are so free that every thought you think will attract to you. If you think thoughts that are in harmony with you, you will feel good.”

“You have been convinced you must justify your life experience. Stop right now where ever you are - working or not - and make a decision to look for the positive aspects of where you are standing right now. You will start attracting to you the balance and freedom you want. Say ‘Today is the first day of the rest of my life, and I say I look for reasons to feel good, and I want to feel good. Nothing is more important to me than that I feel good.’”

“You will evoke more people who also want to feel good, and you will evoke from others reasons to feel good. There is more in harmony with your wanting within others than you realize.”

“Look at your career as the expenditure of life experience in return for the joy of life experience. If you decide you want to feel good, you will find yourself guiding yourself to different behaviors of thought and action.”

“The more specific you are about what you are wanting, the more powerful you are. The law of attraction is shining upon your perspective of what is. So if you’re in lack, you perpetuate it.”

“No matter how justified you are in your negative emotion, you are still messing up your future. “

“Think about what you want. The more specific you are about what you are wanting, the more powerful you are.”

“Then decide in your now to look for reasons to feel good.This opens door for what you want to flow in.”

Freedom

Freedom is the acknowledgement that you may always choose your experience. You can choose negative or positive.

-- Abraham

Parenting, part two

On this tape, Abraham encouraged parents to notice the difference between guiding and controlling the life experience of their children. She says a parent’s goal is to foster the child into a new arena of life experience.

Every parent was a child and remembers the perspective of the child. “From your vision of being a child, you determined to be a better parent,” she said. You decided the things you were never going to do as a parent - “a prime example of making a decision from a place of lack.”

She said humans expect too much of themselves. “There is a tendancy to want to be already knowledgeable on all subjects - a new job, being a parent - you demand understanding of yourself before you have gained it. You can only learn through life experience.”

Tell the child “I do not have all the answers but I do have a certain understanding that life is supposed to be fun and an arena of new decisions to be made and adventures to have.” That is guiding, not controlling.

“Parents cover up their feelings of inferiority / incompletion by saying that ‘I know this’ or ‘I know that.’ At an early age the child sees the parent is not as smart as the parent thinks he is.”

“Acknowledge that you do not have all the answers, or know appropriate action, or know what to have or do, but you do know what you are wanting to feel - and if you do that you will continue on your path and decisions will come to you. You want your children to feel good and make choices from there.”

She helped us look at our relationships with our parents. “Your feelings about your parents -- you keep dragging by the hair that which you have experiencd in the past. The best way to have powerful positive relationship with anyone is to look for what you are wanting to see because that will evoke positive emotion within you.”

“The real question is how do you want to feel about your parents. Do you want to feel good or do you want to hold them as the scapegoat for everything going wrong in your life?”

“You are the common denominator in your life experience. You are the evoker of your experience with others. Let them off the hook. Let them out of the arena of responsibility. Let them be insignificant others for now - don’t care what they think or say about you.”

She says whatever your life experience as a child, you could have changed it. “We want you to understand that you had control but you didn’t know you did so you couldn’t use it.”

“Others want to sympathize and emphathize, say you are justified in your emotion because you had bad parents. We say even though you are justified, you are creating your experience by allowing it. Let your dominant intent be that the majority of the time you feel good. You chose to come forth to learn your strength and to learn that good and bad is in everything even your parents. As you focus on what you want to see, you will feel good.”

“The life experience that you evoke reflects what you are thinking.”

“When you allow negative emotions within you, you attract negative experiences to you. Spend time pivoting” when you notice negative emotions.

“When you have a negative experience it is of value because it is your inner guidance telling you what you want or do not want.”

“If you have had a painful experience in your past, release it to your past. If not it will remain in your now.”

“You have always been the attractor of your experience. Experiencing what you do not want helps you understand what you do want.”

Abraham suggests we can develop a new relationship with our parents no matter what our age. “First, as you go to bed, leave the past behind. When you get up, know that all day you will be looking for what you are wanting to see. Start ahead by wanting a good interaction. Then listen to guidance.”

If you are having an interaction with your parents and you feel bad, leave. “Then say I want a positive experience with them and I want to have guidance on how to have a good relationship with them.”

“You will be the inspiration to evoke positive emotion from others.”

“Different perspectives of a person evoke different emotions in others.”

“Thinking is the receiving of block of thoughts - not necessarily in words. Newborns think, and are very powerful receivers of blocks of thought. As a baby you are responding to the thoughts around you and your response creates your experience.”

“You know it’s hard to imaine a baby being smart enough to get what they want - but watch them.”

Abraham emphasized that we choose the clumps of thoughtforms and people we live with. We are not affected by everyone on the planet unless we choose to be. We choose what we want to be surrounded by.

“Have you had an experience where you could not endure any more and you said ‘I give up - you win.’ This is a powerful point: the point of no longer resisting. Your focus of resistance goes away and you say “I let it win and now it is gone.’ You don’t have to hit rock bottom before you pivot. You can pivot when you feel only a little bad.”

“You are creatures that are so much wanting to experience the positive, that even a little negative is discouraging.”

Love

Love is seeing positive aspects in someone.

What you want is to love -- the feeling of love coming out of you -- and if the other person evokes that from you then you think you are in love with them.

-- Abraham

Parenting, part one

On this tape, Abraham talks about our parents, our children, and how we can have a more harmonious family life.

She says we have a tendency to look for others to credit or blame for our lives, so parents very often are the target of blame for their children.

"Any time you are standing in a place of blame or resentment or justification of why you are in a negative situation, you are in a place of lack, and thus your point of attraction is more and more negative as you focus your attention on blame."

She was emphatic. "To be in a place of blame is negative, so stop it."

"When you are in a place of lack, you attract more lack."

She encouraged each of us to create our own experience.

"You have no responsibility for that which anyone in this world chooses. Your only responsibility you have is to yourself."

She maintained that parents are not responsible for their children. "Parents have been encouraged to take upon themselves the responsibility of their children. That distortion is at the root of the trouble."

Instead, parents influence their children by their thoughts. "If a parent is in the place of lack, wants better for their child, and guides them from a place of lack, then the parent influences the child in a similar experience of lack."

"You can be a positive influence on others when you are in a place of positive emotion and centeredness. You are radiating / oozing / influencing no matter how you are thinking or feeling. You can control whether you are offering a positive or negative influence."

You know whether you are being a positive or negative influence by how you are feeling. "If you feel good, you are offering positive influence. Even if you do not speak, you are radiating what you are thinking / feeling. If you think about troubles, current or future, you are feeling lack and you are negatively influencing those around you. Your children are most affected in a negative way."

“All thought attracts. If a child is influenced in a certain way, it is possible that their whole life will be affected by that influence.”

"The father's and mother's role is to provide an avenue, a physical vehicle, through which energy can be expressed into the world."

"The perfect parent creates a physical body. This being is born. Then they see this child as an individual who is growing. The parent would offer an example of someone who is gloriously involved in this life experience, encouraging the child to find their expression in their own life experience."

"Normally a parent offers a child negative expectations. They want to protect their child, but in that negative offering they are planting the seeds of negative experience."

“As a parent you say it’s a big bad world and I’ll do this for you because you’re too small and don’t know enough. You inflame the child’s sense of lack and increase it away from their sense of who they really are.”

"There is value in looking for positive aspects in all that you interact with."

“You are an uplifter. You are a seeker of growth and joy. You have no greater responsibility to parent and child than anyone else on the planet.”

“Parents learn from their children and children learn from their parents. Every experience is giving you more knowledge whether you are consciously aware of it or not.”

“The inner being is stronger than physical influences. However you have agreed to attract to this physical body by what you are physically thinking - so you are more affected by the thoughts of you and those around you than by your inner being. You chose this. You wanted the benefits and experiences of other perspectives.”

“Every step of the way your inner being is wanting to lead you to role models. The physical you is vibrating according to the thought you are thinking in this conscious moment - if you feel joyful and happy it is your inner being’s way of guiding you toward who you really are.”

“If you are having negative feelings, it’s your inner being’s way of telling you that you are moving away from who you really are. Most of you suppress your inner guidance system and instead listen to those around you. If you have a negative emotion, something is not in harmony with your greater knowing.”

“Everything comes to you via transfer of thought. Everything comes from the Law of Attraction, which is through vibration.”

“Diseases are passed on by transfer of thought or expectation, not genetics. Whatever you are receiving, by virtue of the thoughts you are holding, you are co-creating the experience.”

“Most of you are so guarded, wanting to keep everyone in a place of having a perfect life - saying this should be like this. You focus on the lack of something you want, therefore you are attracting the experience you do not want. And you vote for a solution but you do this from a place of lack. It defies law for you to be able to attract something good when standing in a place of lack.”

“As you focus on blame of what happened 30 years ago, you feel bad, and you attract more negative experiences.”

“When you feel good about who you are and where you stand, you can attract positive experiences.”

“There are two motivations to action - positive drawing from what you want, or negative prodding from the negative repercussion of behavior.

“For a parent, visualize a well-running home with all doing what they are told. You will be inspired to words and actions that will evoke this from your family. Evoke from your positive wanting - harmony, happiness together. See yourself in your family unit, and concentrate on what you are doing.”

“Approach life from your eyes only, your guidance. Harmonize your thoughts and words and actions so you feel good, then you will be in harmony with yourself. Only then will you have the possibility of harmony with others.”

“Always there is a place of harmony within you in terms of how you are wanting to feel. Say “I want to feel good and I want to think, say and do things that harmonize with that which feels good to me.””

“You will realize you have more points of harmony with the family than of disharmony.”

“The one radiating the most emotion is the one in charge. The one with the most influence is the one who has focused most on their thoughts and has thus attracted other thoughts.”

“Give your dominant attention to feeling good. Don’t worry about the actions of others. Through this you will evoke more harmony from those who are around you.”

Seek bliss

What is natural is a state of joy, growth and freedom.

Seek that which is blissful and joyful to you, and you will never have trouble.

-- Abraham

Mating, part two

These are notes from the second side of the tape on Mating.

Abraham started with a simple process to find the perfect mate:

“Evoking the perfect mate comes when you are being the perfect mate. And you do this by saying: I am wanting to be joyful. I am wanting to find my joy.”

There is a difference between wanting a mate and needing a mate. “Needing is focused on lack, and it feels bad or painful. Wanting is focused on wanting. It comes from joy. It feels good and adventurous.”

Abraham reminded us that we can have a good relationship with everyone and anyone. “You have the power to evoke from them a relationship based on the freedom and joy you want because these probabilities already exist within them. Your experience with others will depend on what you evoke from them. Stop blaming the other for the mess of your relationship. You are the attractor of your life experience.”

She says we attract negative comments from others. “If the other says ‘I don’t like your fat stomach’ there is something you have awakened within yourself (or something you see in the other) that has evoked that reaction.”

“Before you can have a good relationship, you must have a good relationship with yourself. If you don’t like you, you won’t evoke others liking you.”

She asked what is the perfect mate? Her suggestion: “The perfect mate makes me feel best about me. The perfect mate evokes in me a feeling of well-being.”

“Evoke from one another what makes you feel good.”

She says that we tend to focus on the negative. “Your attention to flaw -- it gets bigger and bigger -- and then you say you cannot live with it. What would cause something to come forth in someone? Attention to it. You as co-creator must realize that your attention on what you don’t like in the other makes it bigger.”

“What is natural is a state of joy, growth and freedom."

“Seek that which is blissful and joyful to you, and you will never have trouble.”

“If you have someone who is always negative in your face, it is harder to be positive. But every night when you go to bed you separate from all that you have been attracting, and when you wake up you start anew with your attracting.”

“Love is seeing positive aspects in someone.”

“What you want is to love -- the feeling of love coming out of you -- and if the other person evokes that from you then you think you are in love with them.”

“Talk every day to yourself about what you are wanting. “Today I am going to get closer to my perfect mate.” You cannot see the path before you. You can just follow your positive emotion.”

“Identify what you want. Pay attention to how you feel. Follow your guidance. See the positive aspects in everyone you see. Be a selective sifter but don’t guard against anyone. See the positive of others, not the negative. Then you will attract it into your experience.”

Good!

Abraham says that while we are sleeping we are not doing any attracting. While we are awake we are always attracting, either positive things or negative things. Sleep erases the attraction cycle, and when we awaken in the morning we start again from scratch.

Abraham suggests we seize the opportunity to start each day off with positive attraction by declaring that "The only thing that matters is that I feel good," and that today we will attract only good and positive things into our experience.

Huston Smith, renowned religious scholar, has been doing something like this for 70 years. In his autobiography, Tales of Wonder, he writes:

"In college, one of my jobs was opening the school cafeteria at 6:30 a.m. However, I didn't own an alarm clock. Another student left the boarding house at six, so I asked him to wake me. Recently, he reminded me that I awoke the same way every morning. I would shoot bolt upright in bed, stretch out my arms and yell, "Good!" I may wake up differently today, but I still say under my breath, a loud good to the world."

Mating, part one

On this tape, Abraham has good suggestions for those looking for the perfect mate, and for those who are already mated.

Abraham started by reminding us of the Law of Attraction. "It is not your physical being, doing or having that the Law of Attraction works with -- it is your thoughts. It is by virtue of the direction of your thought that you are attracting."

She said that the fantasy of relationship is the walk into the sunset, and yet real life experience shows that relationship is not like that.

She suggests exploring your beliefs around relationship. "In relationship you identify loss of freedom and less joy. As a child, what did you see in adult relationships? What do you see now in others? Do these foster within you expectancy of positive relationship or negative relationship. Acknowledge that the majority of thought regarding relationship has been pointed toward the lack of what is wanted, rather than what is wanted."

"Young people want / believe in good relationship because there is a natural inherent knowing that life is good, and it is good to attract experiences that are good. Your deepest beliefs are in your joy, freedom, growth."

Say to yourself: "Life is supposed to be good and I choose to experience what is good."

"You attract by virtue of your vibration and you vibrate by virtue of your thoughts. And yet you ponder the relationship that is wrong and consider what you do not want -- and then you attract it. So you keep attracting relationships not in harmony with what you want but in absolute harmony with your thoughts," she said.

Guardedness attracts what you are guarded against.

"How can you come into something without guardedness? If you could understand that everything on this planet is for the enhancement of your state of being… Almost none of you feel adequate or whole or sure or secure. You think thoughts that are not in harmony with who you really are, and thus you are out of alignment with your greater being."

When trying to attract a mate, make sure you are feeling good within yourself. "The majority of relationships are not satisfying to the individual because the individual was not satisfied in and of themself when they attracted the partner."

When we try to attract a perfect mate from a place of lack, we attract someone else in lack. "You think 'I am not enough as I stand for I am not whole.' From feeling lack you attract another who is not feeling enough."

If you currently do not have a partner, this is the time to be satisfied with your self before trying to attract a mate.

"When your patterns of thinking are toward the lack of who you are rather than the positive aspects of self, you reach out from lack. 'If this one would love me I will feel better.' There is not another one who can love you enough to compensate for you not loving yourself."

To find a mate, Abraham says "First, find appreciation for self. Second, come together with another for the purpose of co-creation. We would make no effort on the second until we had accomplished the first."

Individual creators must be in a place of positive attraction before they can come together. Two coming together from a place of lack make more lack.

If you do have a mate, Abraham suggests ways to make the relationship even better.

"If you have a partner, stop for a few days to focus on the basics of being satisfied with yourself and looking at positive aspects within yourself. If you do this, all your relationships - minor and major -- would begin being different in your experience."

"How does one come into balance with self? Recognize that you are a very old being who has come to massive conclusions. You as a physical being have access to these conclusions. The way you feel is your conscious awareness of whether you are harmonizing or not harmonizing with your inner being. When you have postivie emotion or thought, you are in harmony."

Abraham pointed out our mistake: "You feel lack and then you look for a way to soothe it. This is backwards."

"Begin each day by reminding yourself that the only thing that matters is that I feel good. Then, when you come into touch with a thought, word or action that doesn't feel good, you'll find yourself moving away from it. Create from the inside out. Don't be so quick to jump into action. First pay attention to how you feel, then talk to yourself about what you want to have. 'I want a relationship where I feel good, where I am uplifted and I uplift them.'

"You are the attractor of your experience. The way you think and feel attracts unto you."

"Feel good and you will attract someone to make you feel good."

"You believe you can take action outside of these laws - you cannot."

"You do things in harmony with what you are feeling, so you must get deliberate control over how you are feeling, which means you must get deliberate control over your thoughts because your thoughts affect your feeling."

"You might feel good about yourself and still not believe you can attract a good relationship, so you won't attract one."

One of Abraham's suggestions is to attract data from those around us. So if you are wanting a good relationship, look around you to see positive aspects in the relationships of others. "Begin pulling the stronger story of positive aspects from the parade of beings in front of you."

If you are currently in relationship, spend time every day noting positive aspects of your relationship, your mate, and of you.

If you pay attention to a flaw, it becomes more apparent in your experience and their experience. If you focus on the positive aspects, you add power to and expand upon those.

"Within all that is there are positive and negative aspects. You as creator of your experience need to focus on the positive aspects as that will be your point of attraction."

"As you stand and complain and defend or rationalize where you are, you will continue to attract what you do not want."

"If you look at the positive aspects, your experience will start to get better and better, and you will attract more positive experience. You cannot attract by virtue of your words and action. It is the vibration of the thought within you that attracts."

"Many of you will find that what you are wanting is in your current relationship but you have been focused on the negative. Others will find that your positiveness is unable to change the other and you will leave."

Abraham says that perfect co-creating is about seeing the positive aspects of each other.

"When you are integrating with another it is always to your advantage to look for their positive aspects because then you draw those into your experience."

"If you spend more time focused on what you are not wanting rather than what you are wanting, then you end up pointing at others saying it's their fault" you don't have what you want.

You must be selfish enough to feel your joy before you have any joy to give to others.

Beat the Drum

We cannot focus upon the weaknesses of one another and evoke strengths. You cannot focus upon the things that you think they are doing wrong, and evoke things that will make you feel better.

You've got to beat the drum that makes you feel good when you beat it. And when you do, you'll be a strong signal of influence that will help them to reconnect with who they are.

--- Abraham

Health, Weight and Mind, part two

On side two of the tape Health, Weight and Mind, Abraham emphasized that we have complete control over our bodies.

"There is nothing else affecting your body other than your thoughts about it."

"To have health is a natural state of being. When you start thinking about lack (of health) you create it."

"The only reason you struggle for health is because you are focused on lack."

She added a new emphasis to the idea that the only thing that matters is that we feel good: "Until you are selfish enough to know that the only thing that matters is that you feel good, you are not of much uplifting value to the Universe. You offer to the Universe that which you are. When you are sick and vulnerable, that is what you are offering."

She warned against adopting a mindset of fear. "The most habitual pattern is to look for what's wrong." She says a doctor's job is to find something wrong with you, and they will keep looking and looking until they find something.

"You have within you some natural core beliefs. Being healthy, joy, freedom, growth - these are the natural state of being within you."

Abraham's prescription for health: "Know you are perfect as you are, and continually reach out to more of what you are."

"Make the decision: I acknowledge that as I am is the result of what I think."

She kicked us out of victim mode: "You are the creator of your experience. You would like a reason that you are other than that you want to be, other than that you have done it to yourself. Any form of justification or rationalization is contrary to what you are wanting. What you are living is what you are thinking."

She reminded us to notice our emotions. When we feel bad, or are having a negative emotion, "this negative emotion means you are in the process of attracting what you do not want."

"Whenever you are feeling negative emotions, stop thinking, speaking or doing and ask yourself what it is that you are wanting. Then you are back on the right path."

She acknowledged that it is hard to always stay positive. "If you have a friend who is sick who wants to talk about if, you will feel cold-hearted not to listen to them, so you listen and you have a knot in your stomach."

At night, however, all attracting stops. So try this exercise Abraham suggested: When you put your head on your pillow tonight, say "All negative attraction is now stopping and tomorrow I will only think of positive attracting." After a few nights of doing this you will notice you are on the right track.

"Say 'I want to feel good' a few times -- the Universe will give you something to feel good about. Don't wait until you feel really bad because it takes time to slow the momentum."

Abraham scoffed at our need to be right. "You have been trained to be objective -- winners and losers -- defensive beings: if I win, you lose. We say you don't have to explain or rationalize your behavior to anyone else. Your job is to create harmony between you and you."

Abraham addressed dieting. "If you have a belief that eating this food will make you fat, eating the food feels bad because your inner being tells you that given the beliefs you hold you are acting against your desire to be slender."

However, it is possible to change your beliefs. "Bridge your beliefs so you can harmonize with your desires. Tell yourself that you want to know that the food you eat does not need to be stored on your hips. Then you will start to attract information that supports your new belief. Some people who are very thin eat a lot and others who are fat eat very little. It's not the food, it's the thoughts about the food." Say to yourself: "I really want to change this belief because it is in my way."

"If you believe that food makes you fat, it will make you fat. There is no other way. Your body can metabolize all you eat as energy or you can store it as fat."

She suggested this approach to weight loss: "Inner being, my intent is to lose weight. You know my beliefs. Please guide me to the behavior that will harmonize both."

Remember to intend, not hope. "Hoping is coming from lack."

Also remember that where you are right now is pretty good. "We don't think you can overdo thinking well of yourself." Your body only responds to your thoughts. If you are feeling good, your thoughts are helping you.

If you are in front of something that gives you negative emotion (like the oreo cookies in the grocery store) give your attention to something else.

Anything that brings a positive emotion to you is of great value.

If you are getting negative support from the people around you, remember that all others are insignificant in terms of you. "If your significant other says there is something in you they do not like, tell them to look somewhere else instead." (Meaning "look at the parts of me that you like, not those that you do not like.")

Likewise, don't pay attention to the things you don't like about yourself. "Attention to the bulges makes them more. Looking at parts you like makes you feel good."

If you feel a negative emotion, remember that is your guidance system telling you that you are thinking, speaking or acting in a way that does not support your wanting. The guidance system is working. "When you feel this negative emotion, bless this guidance system because it is leading you to what you are wanting."

"It feels so good to do things on purpose, and so rotten to do things by default. The real you is as you are wanting to be."

Goals

The reason for desires, goals... for finding those decisions or points of focus, is because they are the life-giving things of the Universe.

Without objects of attention, or objects of desire, Life Force does not come through any of us.

-- Abraham

The Only Thing, part two

We had an interesting discussion on "the only thing that matters is that I feel good."

Thank you to all who participated in person and by email.

Good things happened for people over the two weeks of this experiment - residuals checks arrived in the mail, a good replacement hairdresser was found, physical discomfort was eased away and replaced with a feeling of peace.

We've agreed to continue the experiment for another two weeks. Every morning upon arising, we remind ourselves that "the only thing that matters is that I feel good."  Whenever we find ourselves feeling not good, we check to see what we need to change in our thinking, speaking or doing in order to feel good.

(No one volunteered to try the opposite practice -- focusing on feeling bad -- to see what happens.)

Of course, like most simple practices, this is more complex than it appears on the surface.

We discussed the difference between short-term and long-term gratification. If we know we have to do something we don't want to do, it's best to do it with a positive attitude. Abraham says "your choices of action may be limited, but your choices of thought are not." We go back to the example of cleaning the house. We know we'll feel better when it's cleaned, so why not make the experience one that feels good by changing our thoughts to enthusiasm and satisfaction instead of drudgery and complaining. Another example is with food. If you know you will feel really good eating healthy food, then you need to focus on the long-term benefits instead of the short-term desire for unhealthy food.

Abraham also talks about pre-paving. What we are living today is what we pre-paved with previous thoughts and actions. Sometimes it's not pleasant, but we can still choose our thoughts as we move through the day. The thoughts and actions we choose today are pre-paving our future. Choose wisely.

We also discussed the built-in need for worry. People mentioned how they have to worry about their children. We worked through this, and remembered that Abraham says that "you get more of what you focus on." If you worry about your child, you will get more stress from the child. We also acknowledged that worrying about someone never helps them. If they learn you are worried about them it becomes a burden to them. Instead of worrying, notice what you can think, say or do to alleviate the worry you are feeling. 

This also ties in to Law of Allowing. We need to allow others to live their lives and create their experiences in the way they choose. We do what we can with our thinking, speaking and doing, and then we need to let go.

We'll discuss our ongoing experiment at the next meeting Wed. May 12. If you can't be there, feel free to email me your thoughts ahead of time.

The Only Thing, part one

In the discussion at last Wednesday's meeting, we addressed Abraham's favorite saying: "The only thing that matters is that I feel good."

There was concern that if we only do what feels good we would lie around all day reading and listening to music and none of the necessaries of life like bill-paying or working would get done.

I've heard this concern before, so I thought we would put it to a test.

For the next two weeks, I encourage you to say to yourself upon arising: The only thing that matters today is that I feel good.

As you move through your day, notice how you are feeling. Abraham says that our inner guidance responds to what we are thinking, saying or doing and lets us know if we are on track with our overall goals. Our inner guidance speaks to us through our feelings. If you feel good, you are on the right track. If you feel bad, you are thinking, saying or doing something that is not in alignment with you goals and overall purpose. Your job is to notice whether you feel good or bad. If you feel good, keep on going! If you feel bad, change what you are thinking, saying or doing until you feel good. Then keep going!

That was a really long explanation for the simple task of going through your day feeling good, and changing your thoughts, words or actions if you feel bad.

Will the world and our lives fall apart if we do this for two weeks?

I don't know. Let's find out.

Worry

It is so easy to worry about other people - whether they are our children or family members or other loved ones.

And yet, Abraham says that the ultimate goal is to feel good, and worrying does not feel good.

So how do we get out of the worry trap?

Try using this goal in your workshop meditations: "I am wanting to feel good about (insert name here)."

Short, simple and to the point.

It keeps the focus on you and what you are wanting, which is to feel good. And feeling good about another person supports them more than worrying about them. Also it sets the energy for things to go well for the other person so you can feel good about them.

Of course, it is up to the other person to lead the life they are choosing to live. It is up to you to feel good about them (not necessarily about their actions, but about them).

Give it a try. Let me know what happens.

(Thank you Nancy, for this suggestion.)

Dollars and Abundance, part one

Abraham said there are two subjects: the subject of dollars and the subject of lack of dollars. Whichever you think of, you will get more of. "If you offer thought of lack of dollars, you get lack of dollars." She asked "What is the most common thought you offer regarding dollars? Look at your life experience. If you have all the dollars you are wanting, your balance of thought is on that side."

"When you are thinking negative emotions about dollars, you are pushing them away."

She chided those who say they don't want anything. She suggests they are so worn down by lack that they associate wanting with not having.

"Any time you are justifying or rationalizing or blaming, you are in a place of guardedness and are unable to receive what you are wanting."

"If you are committed to feeling lack, if it's not money it will be something else."

"When you believe there isn't enough to go around -- universe of lack -- you are guarded and defensive. What anyone else has does not have anything to do with what you do or have."

She said to consider what you want. "If the thought of wanting it brings you pleasure, it is in alignment with you."

Abraham said we tend to be externally focused in our attempts at manifesting. "You go about it backwards. You look to what you do or have in order to create your inner experience. Begin instead by identifying how you want to feel or be, then let your inspiration come from that place of being."

"So many of you take action in terms of wanting or having in order to soothe some sort of void. That defies law. Any action taken from a place of void can only create more void. Find your place of beingness and then you will attract into your experience based on your energy of joy."

Abraham said that often humans consider life as a struggle to get to a goal. "Struggle struggle never leads to happiness," she said. "You are so ending focused. You think 'When I get there I will be happy,' rather than enjoying the delicious unfolding."

"When you are looking at the ending place, the tendency is to look at the end from a place of lack. This feeling of lack slows down your creative energy."

"As you focus on what is, you attract more of it."

She reminded us of the bigger spiritual goal. "The eternal joyful becoming is what we are all about. From a joyful satisfied place you are in a position to attract more of what you are wanting."

"Anyone who is in a place of lack, no matter how much action they offer, will attract more lack."

Abraham also reminded us to pay attention to our own inner guidance. "Many people are so caught up in their feeling of unworthiness that they look outside of themselves for guidance instead of listening to their own inner guidance."

Reconnect with your own inner guidance system. Say things like "I want to be the best that I can be" or "I want to harmonize physically in this body with that which I feel is the best and right and good." Then focus on your feelings for guidance. "Believe you have a very strong knowing, and you can trust your inner guidance."

"Every thought that you think vibrates, and by virtue of that thought you attract. When you feel good, you are in a place of attracting what you are wanting. When you think a thought of upliftment, you have a feeling of positive energy from inner guidance. When you think a thought of lack you feel bad, that's your inner guidance."

"You are action oriented. Your society is focused on lack, therefore you feel you must defeat what you don't want in order to get what you do want. This defies law."

"Your primary work is to harmonize your thoughts, words and actions with what feels good. Your action is responsible for a miniscule part of what comes to you. It's your thoughts and words that do most of the work of attraction. It is not what you do that makes a difference, but how you are feeling. This is an indicator of the balance of thought within you and what you are attracting."

"It is the law of attraction, not the law of assertion."

"Look for reasons to feel good, identify what you want, and you will attract it."

Sexuality, part two

Throughout this tape, Abraham emphasized that there is no right way to act. The only thing that matters is that you feel good. When you feel good, you are acting in accordance with your inner guidance. If you feel bad, that is a sign that you have violated your own rules.

The trouble comes when you say "I want to do (fill in the blank) but I shouldn't." This sends your energy in two different directions and drains you.

So which do you do - follow your wanting or your shoulds? Abraham suggests that if your wanting is in alignment with your inner guidance, it will feel good to follow it. Ignore society's shoulds.

Making statements of what you are wanting strengthens your connection to your inner guidance system.

These are some other statements that stood out for me:

Freedom is the acknowledgement that you may always choose your experience. You can choose negative or positive.

Look for the positive aspects in any situation.

As long as you are focused upon what you are wanting, you are infused with energy from the universe.

Abraham also reminded us that we need to focus on what we are wanting, not on what we don't have. "When you are working on attracting something, if it is not here immediately you assume it is not coming and you focus on lack," she chided.

Creation is not orchestration. Think instead of being the attractor. Get your house in order and you will attract what you are wanting.

If you are waiting for someone else to straighten out before you have a happy experience, you will have a long wait.

Pivoting

At a recent meeting, we discussed pivoting, a technique Abraham explains on an earlier tape, and that she referred to during the death tape: "A glorious life experience is for people who are good at pivoting."

In brief, pivoting means turning your mind away from the negative towards the positive. An example is awakening in the morning: instead of saying, oh I wish I had another hour in bed, pivot your mind to thinking what a beautiful day is ahead of you, or how lovely the birds sound, or how happy you are to be alive. You get the idea. Whatever you are doing, think something positive about it.

Our conversation led into whether it is possible to feel positive while cleaning the house. We agreed that sitting in a messy dirty house does not feel good, and we want to feel good. So the question is how can I feel good while cleaning the house. (The answer might be to hire someone to do it.) Possibilities include the positive aspects of how good it feels to be nurturing your home and taking care of it. Or how nice the room looks as you put away papers. If it's dusting, appreciate the objects you are dusting. Choose to enjoy the experience. (If it's paying someone else to do it, remember to enjoy writing the check.) In this spring cleaning season, feeling positive while cleaning the house sounds like a good spiritual practice!

Death and Deterioration, part two

These are notes on the second side of the tape Death and Deterioration:

Abraham continues to remind us that "There is only eternal life experience. Think in terms of this life experience as being part of your eternal life experience. Try to integrate yourself into the full cycle of things so you don't focus on 'ending' as you leave your body."

"You have been convinced you are here to prove yourself worthy of something so you are afraid to leave. You fear that you are not accomplished at what you are supposed to do before completion. There is no completion."

"Do that which feels good unto you."

Remind yourself that "I am the Creator of my experience."

"Everything you are living you have attracted. Since you are an individual, no one else's experience has to be yours."

"By focusing on the positive aspects, you will attract them."

"Within each of you exists the probability of health or decline - it all exists. You can participate in whatever part of it you choose."

"You believe in contagiousness and heredity - you put yourself in position to have an experience you do not want." 

"Negative emotion means holding beliefs that are not in alignment with your wanting."

"If you say 'I am healthy' but your emotions tell you this is not your belief, you need to change something. You want to de-sensitize the negative side of these issues."

"Make statements of what you want. 'I am wanting to be old and well and youthful and vibrant.' Then you will attract the evidence of this. Then you will be surrounded by others who are as you are wanting."

"If you are always wanting to feel good, you will gravitate toward experiences that make you feel good."

"Are you looking at the positive or negative aspects of your experience? You can always look at what you want or what you do not want."

"You have many options for choosing the positive or negative aspects - you tend to follow the patterns you are used to."

"You will be drawn to the things you are really wanting to do."

"You have thousands of opportunities to make these choices - you follow the habit of negativity."

Abraham discussed how it is hard for us to be positive around negative people. "Most of you are so defensive that when someone comes to you feeling negative emotion you are defensive. If you can realize that you are not the target of their negative emotion, if you are standing in the clear place of feeling good, you can help them feel better instead of being negative too."

"Everything that you are thinking and all your beliefs have originated in this physical experience. When you are in time of transition, you are still thinking and believing in terms of the physical. The beliefs that you hold dictate your experience (of dying). You cannot experience outside the boundaries of your belief."

"You try to orchestrate the universe when you can't. Instead, align with the laws of the universe."

"Most of you die from a position of lack. You are focused on what you do not want. Make a new decision. If your body gets sick enough, old enough or tired, make a new decision - 'I have had all that I want and I'm going to leave it.'"

Abraham concluded the session by saying "Death does not exist. Give your attention to the full experience of life. 'The only thing that matters is that I feel good.' You will have a glorious experience in your now, and you will have a glorious transition."

Death and Deterioration, part one

Although it sounds depressing, the tape on Death and Deterioration was actually quite positive. (Isn't all Abraham material positive?)

The first step was to release negative beliefs about aging and deterioration. Abraham reminded us to acknowledge our own value and goodness, and to keep looking for evidence of it.

A reminder: when you are feeling negative emotion, the thought you are thinking is not in harmony with your greater wanting. If you are wanting to be worthy and of value, then the negative feeling you get when you look at yourself in the mirror shows that the thoughts you have when you look at yourself are not in alignment with your wanting to be worthy and of value.

You always feel bad when you are critical of yourself or others. This is a form of lack.

You feel good when you are looking for reasons to feel good about yourself and others.

Be pickier about what you think about.

Abraham reminded us that it is the Law of Attraction, not the Law of Assertion. We are the attractors of our experience. We cannot will an experience into being, instead we need to attract it. The way to have what we are wanting is to relax into it, to allow it.

The process for being healthy is not to defend against illness, but to release into basking in the feeling of health.

The surest way to health is to look for things to talk about and think about that make you feel good.

Find your balanced place of joy.

Your guidance system is connected to your joy. When every thought and action is directed toward creating joy, then you are in alignment with yourself.

Abraham then talked about the greater experience of the soul in the body: You have come into this body to add to all that is. Fear of anything is of no value. You are an eternal being and you are forever eternally focused somewhere. There is no ending to that which you are.